Three Workplace Accommodation Scripts that Protect Your Privacy
I have learned some really useful information about my neurodivergence in the past few years that has really helped not only accept myself and reduce my shame spirals but also has made it easier for me to be productive. For instance, I have realized that visual reminders increase the odds that I will actually remember something. And not just one reminder, like a calendar. I mean multiple visual reminders in different areas of my home and tech. I have also learned how important movement and proper seating is for my ability to focus and complete tasks.
These weren’t mind blowing, out of the box shifts, rather they were relatively small changes to help make my job and responsibilities easier.
Underlying these shifts was the acceptance that I need to accommodate the challenges I face as a Neurodivergent person who has to work very hard to keep everything under control. I am so fortunate that I own my own business and can accommodate myself without anyone else’s input (except my dogs who don’t always appreciate new furniture or multiple alarms). Many of my clients are not so lucky.
As a Neurodivergent Affirming therapist, part of my work is to help clients identify and accommodate their own needs at work. This can be a struggle, especially when you work in a corporate or highly structured environment. I have been pleasantly surprised by many companies who have been more than willing to work with my clients to make changes that ultimately create win win situations.
But…
The dilemma often comes down to how much a client wants to share with their employer about their mental health and the source of their specific challenges. In more recent times, Autism and ADHD have been more normalized and understood in general society. In fact, many of my clients (as well as myself) often find that sharing these diagnoses can give others a context to understand behavior and therefor make accommodation requests easier to fulfill.
There are still workplaces that are toxic and judgmental where private disclosures might result in being treated different or targeted. In these cases, asking for accommodations doesn’t feel safe. As a therapist who has written hundreds of letter requesting accommodations, I am here to tell you that you do not owe your employer your medical story to get functional support.
If you are interested in pursuing work accommodations but don’t want to disclose your diagnoses here are some practical tips:
1. Shift from Diagnosis to Functional Needs
When requesting accommodations under workplace accessibility frameworks (like the ADA, or Americans with Disabilities Act), you are generally required to show that a disability impacts a major life activity. However, your employer needs to know how your work environment impacts your performance, not the exact medical label behind it. A reframing example might look like:
Instead of: "Because of my ADHD and sensory processing issues from Autism, I get overwhelmed in the open office."
Change to: "To maximize my deep-focus time and reduce sensory distractions during complex analytical tasks, I am requesting permission to work remotely two days a week and/or use noise-canceling headphones."
By focusing on functional impacts and performance outcomes, your request looks like a tool to increase your productivity and efficiency rather than a personal plea.
2. Common Accommodations Requests for Neurodivergent Employees
In my conversations with client looking to improve their work environments, these accommodations come up over and over again.
A. Asynchronous Communication
If surprise phone calls send your nervous system into an immediate freeze response, request communication be delivered in writing.
Script: "I process complex project details most effectively when they are delivered in writing. Moving quick status updates to Slack/email will allow me to track action items more accurately."
Script: “I can most effectively provide you with answers and feedback when I am prepared. Sending me some quick bullet points prior to our one on ones will ensure that I am prepared as possible.”
B. Sensory and Focus Boundaries
The impact fluorescent lighting or open-plan seating is significant when you are neurodivergent.
Script: "To maintain sustained focus on detailed deliverables, I am requesting relocation to a quieter workspace area as well as authorization to wear noise-reducing headphones during non-collaborative hours."
C. Flexible Work Hours and/ or Energy-Based Scheduling
Script: "To align my high-focus hours with key deliverables, I would like to adjust my schedule slightly to 10:00 AM – 6:00 PM, ensuring full overlap during core team hours."
3. Protect Your Boundaries During the Interactive Process
If HR asks for documentation, remember that a licensed healthcare provider (like a therapist or doctor) can write an accommodation letter verifying that you have a covered condition and recommending specific functional accommodations without detailing your clinical diagnosis or intimate therapy notes. Make sure to communicate clearly with your provider about what information you are comfortable sharing and what you are not.
I always provide my clients a draft of the letter so that they can approve the information being shared.
The unfortunate truth is that not all work environments are open to accommodations
I prepare my clients for the possibility that their employer will make this process difficult or push back. And there are work places that simply cannot make requested accommodations based on the job description and logistics. This reality often leads to exploration of finding new positions or industries that will be able to better match their needs.
Even if your employer is unwilling or unable to accommodate you, it’s important to continue to validate that your sensory needs are real. It’s easy to fall back into self- destructive patterns of blaming yourself for your differences and fortify your mask.
Please remember that you deserve a working environment where your brain can thrive without having to trade your personal privacy for basic accessibility.